Today’s Department of Education press release, presented without comment

Okay, three comments. One: Yes, it does make sense that Susan Sarandon is in this press release.

Two: The schools selected to add new sports teams aren’t exactly ones with a dearth of athletic options in the first place.

Three: The density of clever puns in this press release must explain why the Department of Education did not have time to let reporters know about Chancellor Carmen Fariña’s public meeting with parents in Brooklyn tonight — right?

Without further ado:

CHANCELLOR CARMEN FARIÑA AND ACTRESS SUSAN SARANDON ANNOUNCE ADDITION OF TABLE TENNIS AND BADMINTON VARSITY SPORT TO PUBLIC SCHOOLS ATHLETIC LEAGUE  New Sports Join cricket, Double Dutch and Rugby, Which Were Added in the Last Five Years NEW YORK — Chancellor Carmen Fariña, actress Susan Sarandon and school officials are bringing a new spin to New York City’s Public Schools Athletic League (PSAL) with the announcement of varsity sport additions of table tennis and badminton. The new sports generated quite a racket among students eager to compete, and schools officials expect the sports to net significant interest and participation in the PSAL league among high school students. Other sports added to the PSAL in the past five years include cricket, Double Dutch and rugby. The PSAL encompasses competitive sports for high school students in public schools. “We are thrilled to serve students’ interests in table tennis and badminton, which will complement the traditional sports offered in City’s schools, such as basketball and football, and other more recent additions like cricket,” Schools Chancellor Carmen Fariña said. “These exciting athletics are a smash hit among students and will expand their skills and opportunities both inside and outside the classroom.” “We applaud the NYC Department of Education’s decision to add table tennis as a new varsity sport in New York City public schools and are pleased the PSAL is working with outside organizations, like American Youth Table Tennis Organization to bring high quality equipment and sport know-how for the benefit of all participating students,” said actress Susan Sarandon. “Table tennis improves the mind and the body with little physical risk or expense – and you can play for the rest of your life unlike other sports.” Table tennis in season in New York City public schools began on March 3 and ends June 1. It is played with a minimum of seven student-athletes per team with three designated as singles players, two for doubles and one optional exhibition match for up to two additional players. A match is played best three of five games, and a game is played to 11 points and must be won by a margin of at least two points. For badminton, the season began on March 3 and ends June 7. It is played with a minimum of seven student-athletes per team with three designated as singles players, two for doubles and one optional exhibition match for up to two additional players. A match is played best two out of three games, and a game is played to 21 points and must be won by a margin of at least two points. “USA Badminton is very pleased to partner with the New York School System in the establishment of the newly formed badminton program,” said USA Badminton CEO Dan Cloppas. “We believe the students of New York City will enjoy learning the sport of badminton which is one of the most played sports in the world and an activity that can be played for a lifetime. This program could be the catalyst that produces the first United States Olympic champion in the sport. We certainly are proud to be a part of assisting in this endeavor.” More than 30,000 student athletes participate in the PSAL, with many playing multiple sports.  In addition, more than 200 schools are participating in the PSAL, competing in 28 varsity sports and nine junior varsity sports, represented by more than 2,400 teams. “The PSAL offers students a variety of sports to participate in to enrich their high school experience,” Deputy Chancellor for Operations Kathleen Grimm said. “We are committed to providing our students with opportunities to excel in the classroom as well as the athletic field.” Eric Goldstein, chief executive for School Support Services who oversees the PSAL, said, “We are offering athletic programs that appeal to students who may not want to go out for the traditional sports. We found a great deal of interest and are excited about adding these sports to the PSAL.” Donald Douglas, PSAL executive director, said, “We want students to enjoy a variety of different sports while in high school and these two spark the interest of many of our students. This is bound to be an exciting season.” The debut season for table tennis includes the following schools: Boys Division Bronx Science High School Lehman Educational Campus Millennium High School Cardozo High School Flushing High School Townsend Harris High School Stuyvesant High School Brooklyn Technical High School FDR High School Campus Acorn Community High School McKee/Staten Island Technical High Schools Tottenville High School Girls Division Bronx Science High School Lehman High School Campus Millennium High School Cardozo High School Flushing High School Townsend Harris High School Stuyvesant High School Brooklyn Technical High School FDR High School Campus James Madison High School McKee/Staten Island Technical High Schools Tottenville High School The debut season for badminton includes the following schools: Boys Division Bronx Science Martin Luther King Jr. High School Campus Flushing International Townsend Harris Stuyvesant High School Brooklyn Technical High School FDR High School Campus Seward Park Educational Campus John Dewey High School Campus James Madison High School Flushing High School Girls Division Bronx Science Martin Luther King Jr. High School Campus Flushing International Flushing High School Townsend Harris High School Stuyvesant High School Brooklyn Technical High School FDR High School Campus John Dewey High School Campus Seward Park Educational Campus Tottenville High School